Maaaaan, I had forgotten how fucking awesome being single is. Now I can appreciate how an inmate must feel on his release date.
Okay, wait before the sensitive ass people, (who probably shouldn’t be following me anyway) get their panties in a wad…. Lemme say this. I already know that not that all relationships are bad, but mine have all sucked monkey nuts. Anyways fuck it…. I’m gonna save that for another day.
So I really wanna talk a minute about Single men post relationship vs. Single women post relationship and the bullshit assed double standards that are at play. That shit is 50 shades of fucked up and I’m not feeling it one bit.
Back in the day Cyndi Lauper had a hit song called “Girls just wanna have fun” I think if she wrote it today she’d have called it “Girls just wanna fuck too” Okayyyyy, maybe that’s a stretch but you know what the hell I’m getting at. (And by all means, don’t comment or email me asking who she is. My name Missy, not Google, go look that shit up.) But back to my point…..
When guys get free, their encouraged to do them, have some drinks, go out, get some ass and enjoy being single. #NovaNewsflash… That fucker was doing that shit long before he was single!! And 9 out of 10 of y’all knew about it!
When girls get free, we’re told to take it slow, enjoy our time alone, reconnect with our inner core, and decide what we want from the next relationship.Wait, whaaaaat? No you didn’t!
Ummm as the proud single Ex of the world’s oldest Fuckboy…. I say “fuck what yall talkin bout!” Y’all can go sit down with that bullshit. I’m tryna have fun! I had TIME to get in touch with my core and figure out what the fuck I want while his bum ass was off doing fuckboy shit and thinking I was a fool. Me, personally, I used my alone time IN THE RELATIONSHIP to get my head straight. Hahaha that’s why I’m single! #BoyBye
Honestly, I do prefer to have a regular source for the🍆🍆🍆🍆. It limits complications and requires less management. But look, shit happens sometimes and a 🍆🍆🍆🍆on standby is sometimes required to tame the 🐱🐱🐱🐱. (PSA:protect the kitty, fuck responsibly)
Here’s what I want you to know about the single girls taking their own needs into control…. They’re not sluts, their more like, bachelorettes! They just have slut like tendencies. 😎😎😎 The grown and sexy bachelorette knows how to handle her business, get the 🍆🍆🍆🍆when she wants it, put the shit on pause when she doesn’t, and still look like a lady in the streets. Bachelorettes like their lives, men, and sex drama free! Sluts on the other hand, lack all of the above. They have no business to speak of, take the dick when and where they can get it, along with any ensuing bullshit that may be tired to it. For them, the word lady is a noun not a verb. It conjours up images in their minds of their grannies in rocking chairs!
Soooo, please stop judging the girls that have survived the fuckboy bullshit and come out the other side knowing what they want and how to get it on their own terms.
After all, girls just wanna have fun! Just like boys do!